I've been thinking of this topic a lot lately. I'm hoping it's just an issue we have at my school and even at others schools in my district, but when did parents get so much control? When were parents allowed to dictate every move that a principal or a teacher makes? And why has my principal allowed it to happen?
I have some students who still do not know or care about how to follow the rules. They are defiant, rude and just plain mean. And they are 6! I know this comes from the home, but they have no remorse and are not shocked or surprised when they are in trouble. They laugh, they make jokes about it and they back talk. It's hard to get through a day without having to talk to at least one student during the course of each particular lesson. I feel so sad for my kids who truly want to learn and who behave well. I feel so frustrated at the parents who allow their children to behave this way with zero consequences at home and I am mad at the administrators who allow the children to continue to behave that way without any consequences at school.
Last week when I was gone, my students were not great for the sub. They were pretty bad. But they do know how to behave when they are supposed to. I took recess and lunch away from them (they still ate, just not with the general population) and they missed out on a lot of fun. I even had a parent come in and observe her child. This week, they are all behaving better. The naughty ones are still naughty, but not as bad. Yesterday, tho, we had a fire drill with 10 minutes left in the day. The students were reminded beforehand of what proper behavior is during a drill. One of my students decided that didn't pertain to him and held up my entire line so he could talk to the boy behind him. I was livid! I spoke with the parent after school (whom I had met with on Friday for 90 minutes) and told her that the behavior was unacceptable and that today he would have to go visit the principal. I know not much would happen, but I need something here, folks. I gave the principal a heads up last night, so she was prepared this morning. Well, guess who was in the office DEMANDING that he child be moved from my class? The parent who wants to defend her child's actions as OK because there was another child involved in the talking and I didn't punish him. In my defense, I have to pick my battles with the other child. This one had been behaving fine til about November. Then he thought it was cool to be bad.
Anyway, the parent was DEMANDING that her child be moved to another room. We only have one classroom available where students can go and it's not a room I would send any student to. The parent decided that if she didn't get her way, she was going to go to the district office and file a complaint against me. I've never had that happen and it makes me so sad. But, the principal stood her ground and told the parent she wouldn't move the child, BUT he isn't supposed to be at our school anyway, so she is more than welcome to take him back to his home school. And that's where he will begin tomorrow. I'm sad to see him go because I think he is a good boy who wants to be liked by the bad boys. He has a very crazy home life (shocker!) and there is no consistent discipline. I honestly doubt that his dad even knows what's going on. I don't think it's my place to tell him since I just met him on Friday.
But when did parents decide that they don't need to parent their children, but then complain when others try to do their job? I know my child isn't perfect, but she knows that when she is at school, she had better behave. She knows that when she is in public, she better behave. She knows the rules of how she is supposed to be in different places. And if she were to do something wrong at school, she would be punished BEFORE I got the whole story rather than me defending her behavior. Is this what has led to our children feeling entitled to everything under the sun? Is this why they need to be rewarded for every little thing they do? Is this why they are defended for hitting someone because the other person MUST have done something wrong first? I don't get it. Where did society go so wrong? When did society begin to think it's OK to do wrong because they can justify every single thing as being OK? I don't get. I just don't get it.