11.11.2012

Funk

This year has been strange.  And I don't like it.  I think I have started several posts this year with these same words.  But it's true.  It's been a strange year so far.  And it has me in a funk.  Even my hubby has commented on me being in a funk.  Not good.  But, when the grade level team isn't able to work together, you don't get much done.  And we are still not working together and still working with the district administrator to get us all "working together for the common good".  Yeah, OK.  So not going to happen.

And before anyone gets all holier than thou and says that we need to try harder, please note that the whole reason we are doing this, for one person, does not take any blame or guilt for their actions.  It'a all everyone else's fault.  When you walk down the hallway and purposely look away from someone to avoid having to say good morning, what do you think will happen?  We will talk to you all the time and invite you to coffee? (FYI - we don't ever go to coffee.)  What do you think will happen when you don't participate in collaboration or want e-mails of important information?  We will assume that you want to be part of the team and join in with the rest of us?  Oh, I'm sorry.  I missed mind reader training that day in college.  I must have slept in that day (I never did that, I was a nerd.).  It's very hard to listen to someone talk about how badly they have been treated when they have brought it on themselves.  Now, are we/I completely innocent?  No.  I could have said Hello more often.  I could have approached and asked how things are going.  I could have done more.  But, to protect myself from the constant barage of e-mails telling me how unprofessional and callous I am, I avoided making contact.  You can only be told so many times that you are no good before you stop trying and work with those who value you as a person and a professional. 

So now, going into week 14 of our school year, we have yet to work as a grade level.  We have yet to sit down and look at Common Core and see what the standards are.  We have yet to sit down, have a good conversation about our kids or what we are teaching or what we need help on.  Instead, we are still meeting with district admins and union reps to solve a problem that I don't think can be solved.  One person does not want to work with another and, even though claims they want to work as a grade level team, won't go to meetings for fear the other person would be there.  To me, that isn't working as a team.  It's wanting to work with others as long as the other person isn't there.  And it's made the team divided.  But it's really 4 against 1.  And it isn't fair to the 1, but they have done it to themselves.  4 of us can work well together and we get along and we share.  1 of us doesn't want to share, won't talk or make eye contact.  And you are the victim in all this? 

I don't get it.  And it has made me sad.  And mad.  And in a funk that I can't get out of.  And it sucks. 

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