Wow! Today was a Monday if I have ever had one. It was just a crazy day. My kids were off, I was off and it wasn't good. I am glad I am home, ready to cozy up on the couch and do some homework. It wasn't the day I was hoping for. With just a few days left (33 to be exact), I want to have calm days, fun days and accomplished days. Today wasn't one of those days. And I feel like I am losing my mind. I hate this feeling!
My students are in one of two groups - they know it or they don't. And it stresses me out when they are in the don't know it group. I have some who will be retained, some who will be tested and some who will go on to 2nd grade. And that's just what happens. They have made their year's growth, tho they aren't at grade level. But they weren't there coming in is what I keep telling myself. Then I question whether I have done all I could do for them. I'm sure the answer is no, but I don't know what more I could have done, other than ignore the rest of the class for months at a time.
And the behavior? AWFUL! I have always prided myself on having a good class, well behaved rule followers. Now they are showing their old selves from the beginning of the year. It's ugly. I have one girl who rolls her eyes at me, gives me dirty looks, the whole shebang. All her mom says is she does it at home, too and she'll talk to her. Um, if my daughter did that, she would think twice before EVER doing it again. It's like my kids' brains were sucked out and replaced with Jello today. Again, not a good Monday at all!
I was just telling my hubby how much I need to get done for Open House (it's May 19, a week before school is OUT!). I was having a freak out moment. He told me that I always do this and yet I get it done. I know I do, but I don't like this feeling. It's all piling on now at the end when there is very little time. I need to breathe, stop planning complicated-for-me stuff and move on. They are 6. They don't care about it a whole lot.
Oh, and to top it off, we (first grade teachers) have to go to a training for math in May. It's 3 days out of class (so 3 days of sub plans - UGH!) at the district office to learn how to teach our math program that we have been using for 3 years. And we don't get to go together. 2 teachers will be going the first week of May, which is our benchmark testing time. Not good planning on the part of the district, but whatever. Rumor is there will be trainings the next 2 weeks after that. I am hoping for the 2nd week, as the 3rd week is our Open House and the training would be the day of and 2 days before. And I would miss out on end of the year stuff and assemblies that we have paid for. Am I being picky and petty? Yes, but who in their right mind does training at the end of the year? Why not do it in the summer and pay us instead of a sub? (It's cheaper to pay a sub than us, I know, but I wouldn't mind the $$$).
I think I am going to go and sit on the couch, watch the news and fold laundry. It's boring and mundane and exactly what I need right now!